And now ... Quick Hits
Scratch that meeting: Who knew our city councillors were so busy? My goodness, the demands on their time! Almost 300 meetings a year requiring their civic responsibilities? And many of these scheduled the same nights as council meetings (don’t planners of those meetings know city council’s schedule?). But never fear. A new absentee policy which will set out the reasons for our elected officials’ absences should go a long way to showing the electorate exactly why they have opted out of the Monday night (and other meetings) gabfests. Including if it’s only for vacation. You get an F: New reports cards will not have letter grades. In these oh-so-sensitive times education planners probably thought grades were discriminatory. How can you have “A” students and “B” students? It’s like 1st and 2nd class citizens! New report cards instead will have tepid remarks like “progressing with difficulty.” But still “progressing,” get it? Maybe educators should just get an old-fashioned F. Crossed workers: Marathon Oil lets workers know who’s boss, even if it’s not on company time. More than 40 workers at the company’s Detroit refinery were fired – that’s right fired – after being caught jaywalking across a public street outside company property. But, alas, a resolution was reached with the union, and the recalcitrant workers will only serve a three-day suspension. But they’ve been warned: ‘if you do it again, you’re outta here!’
Women on ice: Love the fact Canada’s women’s team celebrated with beer and bubbly on the ice (not to mention taking over the Zamboni; oh ya oh ya - don't forget the stogies!) following their smashing victory against the red white and blue Yanks (no offence, Yanks!) in the Olympics final. The celebration belied stereotypes about how women and young athletes are expected to deport themselves. And that being Canadian also means you can't have fun. You go girls!
New cliche for hard times: With the City of Detroit’s budget expected to shrink between $360 and $720 million – gasp! – one top official has revised the cliché “doing more with less” to doing “less with less.” Hot Diggity: So the time-honoured hot dog is making the young’uns choke? Here’s an idea. Keep the regular size hot dogs for the grown-ups but make sure they’re clearly-labelled ADULT preferably without see-through wrap. And you know those mini hot dogs for party plates no one eats anymore? A whole new market - make them KIDS’ hot dogs. Clever, no?
Council no shows: The next time city councillors miss meetings for no good reason they should stay after class, er, meeting, and write one-hundred times “I’m a very bad councillor and won’t miss another meeting”.....or sit in a corner with a Dunce cap ..... or – what were they thinking?
Debit scam: We’ve always wondered why people use debit cards. They seem to be a way of accelerating the emptying of one’s bank account. They’re plastic so cash out of sight out of mind, right? Credit cards are preferred. Not only do you make interest for a month before you pay your bill but you can collect points and other incentives. ”Discovery” school: Only what parents are “discovering” at Lakeshore’s relatively new Discovery School, with vast overcrowding, isn’t so good – abysmal washrooms, soiled floors...okay, enough.
Sinatra recycles: Not only do mob bosses dress well (see below) but their families invest in recycling businesses, or did. The National Post reports that Montreal's Rizzuto family owned thousands of shares in a company that did business with several Canadian cities, including Windsor, for pedestrian recycling bins. We've heard about laundered money but recycled trash? Sinatra lives: You have to hand it to the Mafia. They’re the only ones who still dress like it’s 1957. Here he is in all his glory, reputed Montreal mob boss Nicolo Rizzuto, arriving in court this week, looking dapper in white shirt, tie, overcoat and of course fedora. He probably did it his way, too.
Agony (definition): Being subjected to Canadian network television during Super Bowl commercial breaks. They misspoke: Barack Obama telling cash-strapped Americans not to “blow a bunch of cash in Vegas” brought a denunciation from Las Vegas’s mayor who said O, who had made a similar comment about Sin City last year, was “a real slow learner” and had a “psychological hang-up” about his fair town. And, on the Toyota front, Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood told worried Toyota drivers to simply “stop driving” their vehicles. Oh okay. Conflicted: Good to see councillors Caroline Postma, Ron Jones and Bill Marra recuse themselves from city council discussion over the volatile daycare issue. The reasons? Jones’s sister-in-law is a manager in the social services dept., Postma reportedly has a friend closely involved in the issue, and Marra heads an agency that has funded daycare seasonal employment. Obviously these councillors have raised the ethical bar. We’re waiting now for a councillor to excuse herself because she’s a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend who has some “I-can’t-remember-exactly-what-it-was” involvement in the issue under debate....
Not sale days: With OPSEU putting up a strong front - WE'RE NOT GOING TO TAKE IT, DO YOU HEAR? - about any plan by Ontario's Grits to seek concessions because, well, the province happens to be $24.7 billion in the hole, it raises the question. Back in the early 1990s when former premier and socialist comrade-in-arms Bob Rae imposed union concessions the same angry union labelled them "Rae Days." If golly-gee-good Dalton McGuinty imposes the same unpaid days off, will the union call them "Dalton Days?" Hmm, has a nice ring to it. Bonk: Oh yes the Conference Board of Canada predicts Windsor will grow by a nice 2.6 per cent this year. Then word comes that a net 250 Ford jobs will be lost when the Windsor Engine plant eliminates its second shift making engines for the F-150 pick-up.
The Owe in Obama: Remember the O signs during the 2008 presidential campaign? Some said they looked like a service station logo. But they take on new significance. That’s because the Congressional Budget Office is now predicting a $1.35 trillion deficit this year. Meanwhile the total public debt north of the border is $12,245 trillion smackers. Carping about carp: What is it with the Detroit media? About every third day there’s some news story, editorial or columnist, carping about the ferocious Asian carp’s threat to the Great Lakes' ecosystem. Now comes word the threat may be overblown. Like garbage from “Canada” there are a select few topics that seem to obsess the Michigan media. Asian carp is the latest. Yeah, we’re sure that’s what the hoi polli are really concerned about as they down their morning coffee over at Denny’s. What goes around...: Or, unintended consequences dept. That City of Windsor CUPE strike last summer has not only resulted in city council looking at contracting out parking and garbage services but closing daycare centres, a main reason being that parents withdrew kids because the centres weren’t open during the strike.
Can’t resist dept: The city’s (former?) Integrity Commissioner Earl Basse didn’t show up at city council Monday to discuss his report into Coun. Ron Jones’s numerous Blackberry phone calls to CUPE 543 President Jean Fox during last year’s civic strike despite saying he would be present. That’s what you call not having a lot of ... integrity.
Sergio's wardrobe (2): WON isn't the only publication to comment on Sergio Marchionne's sweather addiction. Car and Driver magazine felt the need to divert attention from covering the look of cars to covering the look of the Chrysler CEO.
Click here to read it
Dirty politics: Whoever thought there would be a bidding war for dirt? But if you thought Windsor’s relationship with Essex County was already bad you probably haven’t seen anything. With excavation of a few million cubic yards for the Windsor Essex Parkway municipal reps are already putting their stakes in the ground. The city could build a Malden Hill II or III. A private quarry in Amherstburg says it could use the dirt to fill a quarry. A’burg Mayor Wayne Hurst wants it to cap a soda ash pond. And the Essex-Windsor Solid Waste Authority thinks it should line the old Maidstone dump. Watch out for a lot of mud-slinging in the months ahead.
Sergio’s sweater: Sergio Marchionne we love you. Not only are you a U of Windsor grad but, until now, the hero for rescuing Chrysler. But, hey, that sweater you were wearing at the auto show. Every time we see you, you seem to be in the same sweater. Okay fine, we understand you’re a busy guy and living out of a suitcase commuting between Turin and Auburn Hills. But maybe you could at least change the colour once in awhile?
Good pay if you can get it (4): It’s true Essex County councillors voting themselves a raise (only politicians have this perk) may not add a hill of beans to flatter-than-flat Essex County. An additional $19,000 for all concerned? Who cares! But the warden’s pay does go up from $46,000+ to $57,000+. That’s a tidy sum, especially for someone who has another job. But not to worry, we could be living in Toronto, where councillors rake in $100,000 each per year.
Ernie for Mayor! Good to see Ernie Lamont has tossed his hat into the ring for Windsor’s top job. He’s sure looking dapper these days though the gray hair is a bit of a surprise (we all age). And that nifty new Bacon Man vehicle looks a few notches up from the traditional Bacon van festooned with logos. Ernie claims to be the father of casino gambling in Windsor. And this visionary is fast off the mark with more grandiose schemes. The 747 plane resto on Riverside Dr. is a great idea. But he would have to contend with speeding drivers wanting to get home from work, complaints from hi-rise residents who don’t like the noise of jet engine thrust, and riverfront purists who would object to its blocking the scenic view of Detroit. How much is that baloney, er, pepperoni, Ernie?
'When I was in school...' They didn’t go in for these here ”informal progress reports” for the elementary young’uns. No, they had real report cards with real marks, in fact percentages out of 100. These came four times a year. How did the stressed-out (term wasn’t invented) teachers achieve that? Why, they gave exams (not “tests”) on knowledge covered up to that time. Simple to do – just collect the exam results on the different subjects, divide the results, and you get the student’s average. Plop on report card & send little Johnny on his way. Teacher didn’t have to meet the parents either.
One down, another to go: A Caledonia family has settled out of court in their lawsuit against the province and OPP over what the family said were police and government officials abandoning them to lawnessness by native protesters. Now word comes that OPP Commissioner Julian Fantino will face a criminal charge in influencing - and thereby intimidating - local municipal councillors for backing those opposed to the protest. My my.
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